Satan's Secret Fear - Part Three

In the previous two blogs we discovered that Satan trembles when a believer has an undivided heart and radically pursues the Kingdom of God. We also examined how unity in the family creates an atmosphere where God’s Kingdom invades the earthly realm. Satan will stop at nothing to bring division in our own hearts and in our homes.

It stands to reason that he will also seek to tear down relationships built among the larger body of Christ. Just as he exploits areas of emotional and relational immaturity in a family, Satan will use the same tactics upon the Church at large. As we seek to move and mature in faith and love - Satan will seek to sow discord, strife, fear, and ultimately division.

He absolutely fears our unity. The book of Acts gives insight into the power of unity against the enemy. The Holy Spirit was poured out in power upon the united Body. There were healings, deliverances, and not one among the fellowship had unmet need.  They were recognized as Christ’s disciples by their love for one another... and the LORD added daily to their number.

While Church growth programs today focus on “adding to our number,” perhaps it would be better to focus on unity birthed by love. Maybe when we get that right the Lord will add daily to our number.

Yet this writer clearly recognizes unity is no easy task, especially in our American culture. It does not take much effort on Satan’s part to bring division and discord. Ours is a culture that idolizes independence; that emphasizes “rights” and being right; that disconnects when offended.

It takes commitment, faith, emotional health and relational skills to walk in the pure love that produces unity.

While we may join together in a ministry related task – it is rare that we work to form solid relationships that can withstand the testing of time and tribulation.

 I can’t help but wonder if maybe the early Church knew something we have long since lost. The simplicity of their fellowship – daily times of supping together, meeting for teaching, and most of all – prayer...could that have prepared their hearts for the unity that followed? Is that what brought them into “one accord” with one heart and mind – sharing the good news that Christ is alive and His Kingdom come?

Did those extended times of contact pave the way for an intimacy of hearts, solidarity in relationship, a security in knowing a whole community was committed to you? Will that not be how it is upon His return? He will rule and lead – we will follow as one.

Imagine, one army, standing united against the schemes and attacks of our foe.

Imagine, one army, moving together in love to enforce the victory of Calvary within our homes and communities.

Imagine, one army, serving our One Lord with joy, faith, love – unity!

Perhaps HE is waiting on us to “assemble” before He returns – just a thought!

Our enemy already knows the power, the blessing that will come when we mature to this level of Christ-like character. I am convinced our unity will be the sign of Satan’s imminent departure from the realm of earth.

Let us make it our goal to cooperate with the Holy Spirit to become the ONE that displays the full glory of our King.

Satan's Greatest Fear - Part Two

Satan greatly fears unity within the individual Believer, the family and the larger body of Christ. In the previous blog we examined his efforts to sow division in the heart of a believer. A double-minded, uncommitted believer is no threat to the demonic forces that shadow our land.

There can be little doubt that he also sows division and discord within the family unit. Keep in mind that the family was God’s first “institution” designed to occupy the land and spread His Kingdom on earth. It is here where we learn intimacy, unconditional love, acceptance, selflessness, and even boundaries. It is within the family setting that Believers are stretched to consistently display the full array of the love of Christ to its members. It is here where each member lives “naked” before others.

So how does the enemy worm his way into Christian homes in efforts to prevent unity?

One tactic is to exploit emotional immaturity. Emotional health is not emphasized in our culture – including the church. It takes conscious effort to be aware of what we are feeling and “why”. Self-awareness is not given value or priority. Therefore, many of us grow up building a major wall of self-protection. We desperately try to “keep out” anything and anyone that hurts us.

However, it is impossible to live in a family and not get wounded. It’s what we do with these hurts that matters the most. In an emotionally healthy marriage, such wounds can open the door to greater intimacy. But when one or both spouses lack emotional maturity, the door to isolation and division is opened.

Unforgiveness, resentment, distrust, bitterness, fear, discouragement, and indifference begin to set the tone for the environment. Such families strive to remain “functional” in appearance, while lacking the health needed to support true unity. The full measure of Godly love is neither experienced nor given. We live far below God’s intent.

Satan will also take advantage of our lack of relationship building skills. We are a culture that: fights to be heard, yet rarely listens; blames quickly, yet rarely takes personal responsibility; values our rights above our relationships; and, simply does not know how to enter another’s world without selfish intent. We look to others to fill our needs, find our security, and provide us with a sense of identity and worth.

Adding to the hurt and isolation is the fact that many families live at such a fast pace that deep, meaningful interactions rarely takes place. We live in the same house more or less as strangers.  At best we make small talk over trivial matters – trying to fix or connect on some minor issue. Relationships don’t go to a level of deep intimacy because we lack the commitment and skills need to really connect with another’s heart.

Satan deceives us into accepting this level of loneliness and disconnect as normal. While it is true that only Christ can meet all our needs, He has designed the family unit to provide intimacy and serve as the example of His desire for intimate fellowship with His creation.

In a family – each believer is confronted with his or her own inadequacy to live up to the standard of Christ. They are also exposed to glimpses of the fallen nature that still influence their spouse and children. What we do when faced with these realities will determine the success of satan’s tactics to divide.

Join us for part three to discover how satan stirs division among the larger Body of Christ.

Satan's Secret Fear - Part One

Satan, the enemy of our souls, has a horrible weak spot. Not since the book of Acts, has the Church effectively used this powerful weapon in efforts to wage war against our nemesis. In fact, it is such a powerful weapon that Satan has done, and continues to do, all within his power to stop it from being activated.

So what is this weapon of mass destruction against demonic powers and principalities? It is unity - the state of wholeness or oneness.

How does Satan thwart the body of Christ from moving in unity? He attacks and deceives in three key areas: the individual; the family; and the fellowship.

First, he attacks the individual believer. He convinces us there is nothing wrong with being divided in our own heart.  Half hearted Christianity is evidenced by the pursuit of worldly pleasure, comfort, status, approval, etc.  above “seeking first the Kingdom”.  Revelations refers to this as a “lukewarm” relationship with Christ.  

We are deceived into building our lives on an impure mixture of God’s Kingdom and the fallen world’s systems.   The goal is to control what “faith” will cost us personally. This is extremely dangerous territory for a Believer.

In his craftiness, Satan blinds us from grasping the severity of the exchange when we accepted Christ’s sacrifice. We are to be dead to self serving existence (which only leads to sin) and we are to be fully alive to Christ alone. This means that God is the center and leader of 100% of our life. It belongs to Him to be used for the purpose of His Kingdom. While He is good and worthy of that level of allegiance – few want to go there.

When we recognize that our identity, security and significance come only from our relationship with the King - our eyes become open to the division within our own heart and mind. In response to this revelation, we are invited to consistently choose to surrender our will and follow Him. “Cost” is no longer an issue – because the value of His presence and our faith far outweigh any level of personal sacrifice.

Not many who proclaim to be Believers are viable threats to the demonic forces that permeate our world.  It is only those who are endowed with an undivided heart and an unwavering commitment to the King. Because he or she dwells so completely in union with Christ – it is as if God Himself is visible to the world through that Believer.  No wonder Satan will do all he can to distract, distort and deceive us away from a pervasive intimacy with Christ.

A committed, undivided heart for God – do you have one? It will be reflected by what you pursue: what you do with your time; money and resources; how you invest in others, etc. 

If you know you are not as committed as you need to be, tell Him – be honest. Invite Him to form such a heart and mind within you – after all, such things really are His work; we simply yield to Him in the process.

But understand this – should you choose to really follow Him – you are waging war on the enemy. You will be a target because you will be a threat. 

Stop back Wednesday to learn how Satan attacks and neutralizes our effectiveness by bringing division to the family.

I'm Gettin Nuthin for Christmas!!

Seriously! Absolutely nothing! Nada! Okay – it isn’t because I have been unusually bad (at least no worse than usual).

And truly, what I mean is – I am getting nothing for Christmas – no presents for my husband, no presents for my kids, and so on.

I am not shopping for one darn thing this year! No standing in line for hours; no fighting for parking spaces; no hunting for that “hottest item” of the year; no wrapping odd shaped packages; no threat of needing to return items that don’t fit; no spending huge amounts of money for 30 seconds of jubilation (followed by meltdowns or disappointment when festivities are over). In some respects it is quite liberating!

However, before you write me off as the Grinch or Ebenezer Scrooge – let me explain.

In America, Christmas is rarely about giving items of need. Instead it is about feeding the wants of others and then feeling good about ourselves for doing so. Let’s face it – our kids may “need” socks – but this is NOT what they are whispering in Santa’s ear at the mall.

Looking at the mountain of stuff we already own and considering ourselves blessed, it seemed appropriate to question what more is truly necessary. Sure, our kids could think of things they want. These things might even give them some temporary satisfaction. Even I could think of a few things I’d like to have.  But a better opportunity came along.

This year, our church body is raising money for a Clear Blue Well. Our goal is to provide sanitary drinking water to areas of great need. We decided to donate whatever money we might spend on presents and give it to this need instead.

It seems silly to fill our kids’ lives with one more gadget; one more toy; one more temporary “fix” of enjoyment when millions of children die each year because they lack clean drinking water. I can’t help but think how much we take something as simple as running water for granted. If WE had limited access to clean water – how important would that latest video game or toy be then?

Our kids are taking it all in stride. They understand the importance of giving – though I am pretty sure one of them secretly wishes we’d give only part of the money away. This way they can still get presents too.

 I realize this is the solution many families apply - give some away, keep some for self. But how much more could be done if we truly let go of the world’s lusts and live by another standard?

Personally, I wonder if my kids remember what they got last year.  I’m not even sure I remember! I don’t see them enjoying these gifts or benefiting from them on a daily basis. Would their life be any less complete without them? I really doubt it.

But WATER??? What if they no longer had THAT precious gift? I know that is a blessing we would all miss very much!

Learn more about the Clear Blue Well project.

Donations can be made to our partnering project through:

Lifesong Church

1236 Huron Rd. SE

Massillon, OH 44646

Please designate for “Clear Blue Well”

Unity Begins With You

Unity begins with each individual believer understanding, receiving and walking in covenant oneness with God. This is what Christ purchased for us. When Jesus prayed for our unity in the Gospel of John, He asked that we would be one just like He and the Father are one. It begins by recognizing that we are one with Him. ALL that He is (His nature) and all that He has (His resources and power) are available to each one of us.

His desire is that He would not have to hold anything back but can freely give to us all He is and has. However, our ability to receive His Fullness will be greatly influenced by our own willingness to give Him all that we are and have. If we are unwilling to turn over our brokenness - including sin - how can we expect to receive His forgiveness and healing? If we are unwilling to turn over our lack - how can we expect His abundance? If we won't surrender our heart of stone, filled with judgment and apathy towards our broken world - how can we expect to receive His heart of flesh filled with love, forgiveness, compassion and hope for others?

There is no room for a divided heart in the kingdom of God. We must get "the world" out of us in order to bring the Kingdom into the world around us. “You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God” (Jas 4:4). This isn’t just referring to moral sin but refers to partnering with world systems and pursing worldly gain.

Too many believers miss this truth. We have marginalized the gospel into little more than a morally sanitized version of worldly pursuits and interests. We hang on to our desire for "the good life" Jesus promises and falsely assume it means worldly success. Oh how we grieve His heart and miss the opportunity to store up treasures in heaven when all we want is a comfortable life built on earthly goals.

Jesus’ heart was not to build an earthly kingdom but to extend a heavenly one – one that is of another world. His mission was entirely “other” worldly. He is looking for His people who have the same heart, mind and will as His. He is not attracted to us when we simply try to “look good” or morally superior in a sin full world. He is attracted to us when we are completely surrendered to His plans and purposes.

It is in that surrender that we can receive His Fullness. It is there where we become one with Him. This allows us to connect with others who are of “one mind, one heart, and one accord” – HIS.

Remember – ALL that He is and has is available to us. Can He say the same about each of us?

There is no greater pursuit than ALL of Him. Are we truly seeking Him first? Are we pursuing His Kingdom above all else? Or have we settled down to build a life in this world that merely gives Him token recognition as Savior, Lord and King of Kings?

What steps can you take today to strengthen your unity with Him? Allow Him to expose any areas of division in your heart and choose to surrender. Stop building in the world and start truly building in the Kingdom. There is no greater joy!

June 2011 Soul Care News

All About Discipleship:

What is repentance?

That seems like an easy question, but many of us live with a wrong understanding in regards to repentance. We view it as “feeling sorry” for doing something morally wrong. Therefore “repentance” is a shame associated response to behavioral sin. Beyond that “repenting” was something we did when we first came to Christ.

But this is not what “repentance” really means. In fact, at its very root, repentance has little to do with behavior. It has to do with changing the way we think (or believe). When thinking changes, behavior gradually lines up to “bear fruit keeping with repentance”.

With this understanding we must realize that repentance is not a onetime act. We are called to turn away from wrong thinking anytime the Lord reveals beliefs or attitudes that do not line up with His Truth. We must repent over:

o   any wrong thought about God, His intentions, or His ability

o   any wrong thought about ourselves

o   any life focus that does not line up with God’s plan for us to love others and extend His kingdom on earth

To truly walk with Christ, we must accept with great humility, that His thoughts are not our thoughts.  Rather than leaning on our own sanitized version of human understanding, we must become relationally dependent upon God as He equips us with the mind of Christ. True repentance is exchanging our faulty, earth bound thinking for the Truth that reigns in God’s Kingdom. This is the starting point of faith that leads to radical transformation.

All About Emotions:

The Hidden Value of Stress

Stress is an emotional and physical reaction to pressure put on us by external circumstances or our own expectations. Most of us view stress as a negative thing because we don’t know what to do with it. As a result we consume vast amounts of energy trying to control or escape stress.

But there is an “up” side to stress. In fact, stress is a tool used by God to reveal our character, our focus, or our faulty thinking.

We can all exhibit great character when its smooth sailing – but rough seas reveal areas where we still need to grow. Can we maintain joy, peace, patience and self-control when stressed? Do we still exhibit love and kindness to those around us?

Stress often occurs when we are not focused on God’s priorities. As such, we are unable to enter His rest because we are busy building our own kingdoms instead of aligning our priorities with His.

Stress may also occur when we don’t have proper thinking about situations and expectations. For example, stress may indicate we are failing to trust in God’s goodness or willingness to provide. Stress can also be a result of unrealistic expectations we set for ourselves. This happens when we get our worth from our performance rather than rooting our identity in Christ.

When feeling exceptionally stressed, take time to learn from it. What might God long to reveal to you in the midst of your stressful condition? How might you need to grow, adapt or adjust in order to maintain internal peace?  Rather than just petitioning God to deliver you from stressful circumstances, seek to cooperate with Him as He teaches you to live in peace despite the storms around you.

All About Health/Nutrition:

Enjoy the Physical and Emotional Benefits of Massage

There are numerous health benefits to massage. Physically, massage can minimize pain and stiffness, lower blood pressure, and even boost immunity. Emotionally, massage can reduce stress, minimize anxiety and reduce symptoms of depression.

Looking for the best deal for a massage? Look no further!  Priceless Massage is the only place where you set the price for your massage. Enjoy either a ½ hour massage or a full hour massage, and then leave a fair donation.

The Relaxation Massage encourages full body relaxation through the healing power of touch. Gentle pressure combined with long, smooth strokes result in improved circulation and a welcome state of serenity.

The Therapeutic Massage restores deep layers of muscle tissue and fascia strained from everyday stress and chronic patterns of tension. Integrated massage techniques of compression, trigger point release are coupled with concentrated strokes to realign connective tissue. This treatment is ideal for soothing the neck, back, and shoulders.

Call 330-704-9773 for an appointment. Priceless Massage is located 5 minutes from the Hall of Fame in Canton.

All About Relationships:

Hearing What Really Matters

Relationships are about connecting. It’s a process of revealing ourselves and discovering others. Yet few of us “do” relationships well. Oh, we might be able to “meet on common ground” and talk about surface similarities. But when it comes to developing true intimacy with others, we have no clue how it’s done.

One desperately needed skill is listening. When we listen, we must intentionally seek to go beyond the words we hear and journey to discover the heart inside. Too often we communicate information but never develop connection. We may get facts straight and resolve surface issues so we can “function” - but hearts remain untouched or neglected.

To listen with the intent to connect is one of the greatest gifts we can give to others. Here are some quick tips to help develop the skill:

·         Lay down your “right” to be heard – refuse to get defensive and offended

·         Lay aside desires to “fix” or solve the other person’s problems

·         Ask them to share their feelings; quietly allow them to process

·         Invite them to keep sharing - “tell me more”… “what else?”

·         Clarify – paraphrase what you heard them say about how they feel. Ask them to correct your understanding – keep listening until they confirm they felt heard

It is extremely important to “lay down your life” when listening. Your goal is not to be heard or understood at this point. It is to enter into the other person’s frame of reference. In a healthy, mutually edifying relationship – this skill will develop in both parties so that each one can benefit from the connection.

Keep in mind, communication that leads to connection is a struggle for most people. While listening is only one aspect - do not hesitate to seek help to improve this skill. Growth is a process! Our coaching services are a great place to start.

All About Finances:

Suffering from a Poverty Mindset

Has God gone bankrupt? I used to wonder when I repeatedly heard a Christian agency tell clients “sorry, we have no funding to help you”.  Now I realize they were not called to be the answer to a client’s every need. But what perplexes me is that this is precisely the mindset that many of us have. It is a frame of reference that focuses on what we lack, rather than tapping into the infinite resources of our Provider. It is living with the belief of “limited potential and finite possibilities”.

Let me first clarify that I do not believe God wants our focus to become materialistic. When we talk about Him being our Provider, it is never so that we can gratify the lust of the flesh. Instead, it is about His resources being available to us in order to fulfill the call He has placed on our lives.

The Body of Christ suffers because many are building their own kingdoms first. We buy into thinking that we will step into our callings only after we have our financial needs met. But we never have enough – so we never step into our destiny, and lives remain unchanged for the Kingdom of God.

Would we ever be bold enough to say “God, I don’t see how you will do it, I don’t see how you will provide, but no matter what the cost, I will not settle for anything less than walking in your will”? Will we truly leave “the world” behind in order to pursue the Kingdom?

At the root of a poverty mindset is fear and unbelief. We fear “having need” that we cannot meet on our own.  We fear judgment and criticism from others who claim we are irresponsible if we don’t conform to worldly priorities. We don’t believe that God will be faithful to His end when He tells us to seek first His Kingdom and He will take care of our needs. So basically, we don’t seek HIS Kingdom first.

I believe God sees our provision issues radically different than the way we do. I believe, as a whole, we fall far short of tapping into the tremendous resources available to us if we would learn to operate in faith. I know I am growing in this area. I invite you along for the journey!

The Measure of True Forgiveness

True forgiveness is not just the absence of malice; it is also the presence of unconditional love - even love toward the offender.   Such radical forgiveness, such willing surrender, is a super natural grace found only at the cross.                            

It is only in the out pouring of our “self” that we make way for Christ’s overcoming love to fill us and flow through us to the world around us.

Faced with this crucifying reality, we may find ourselves tempted to justify a stubborn, unforgiving heart. After all, many of us have borne great offenses. The wounds run deep, the damage is great. How could God call us to abandon the post of self protection and be willing to love in abundance? Doesn’t He understand how much it hurts? Doesn’t He understand our betrayal? Doesn’t He see how wicked, perverted and unjust the violence was against us?

Yes, God is compassionate.  He will comfort you in your grief. But I ask you to consider Him who went before us.  How great was the wound YOUR sin inflicted upon Him? Is not your betrayal against Him greater than what you have suffered at the hands of others? He that knew no sin became sin – YOUR sin – that you might become His righteousness.

So can we ever justify defying His request to forgive as we have been forgiven – to love as he has loved us?

Be wary of nursing the wounds of your offense. There is no room at the cross for self-pity.  By His stripes you ARE healed from that wound, but ONLY if you make the exchange.  Jesus asks “do you want to be made well”?  Do you want to be whole – then you must go the way of the cross. You must embrace the pain – do not try to avoid it. You must move forward in a willingness to display Christ love, you mustn’t shrink back in fear of future offense. When you said “yes” to Jesus, you surrendered your right to remain in bondage to offense.

If indeed your life is hidden in Him, you will find the grace to love as He loves – to move beyond offense with a tender, broken heart, still willing to let His love seep out and water a dying world.

Yes, somehow resurrection life comes. The Holy Spirit is attracted to a broken contrite heart that is yielded to the purposes of God.  God comes forth in the midst of our anguish and makes all things glorious and new.

Keep your eyes on the prize which is Christ Jesus. Remember, when Christ, who is our life, appears, you will share in His glory (Col 3:4). Nothing you have endured can compare to this richest of treasures.

April Newsletter (Soul Care Center)

All about Emotions:

Create a New Perspective - Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude

Of all the emotions we experience, “thanksgiving” has the unique ability to change the way we view the world around us. There is something about carrying an “attitude of gratitude” that lessens our likelihood to complain, whine or snap at others.

If we think about it, we really have plenty to be thankful for – even when we find ourselves in the midst of difficult circumstances. Praising God and giving thanks will increase the opportunity for us to see God even in the midst of trials.

Because there is so much creative power in thanksgiving, I encourage you to actually cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Here are a number of ideas to help you build a thankful heart:

·         Create a thankful journal – each day list a minimum of 10 things you are thankful about. Do not repeat items – keep it fresh!

·         Be mindful to thank people as they serve or bless you – whether it’s family, friends, co-workers, or the cashier at the supermarket.

·         Think back over your life – identify three people who made a positive impact on your life. Write them a thank you card telling them what it meant to you!

·         Tape up 2 – 3 pieces of poster board in your kitchen or living room. Grab some markers and encourage everyone to write down anything they are thankful for throughout the next month. See how many items are listed.

·         Turn a negative into a positive. Scripture exhorts us to give thanks in all circumstances – God will use all things for our good when we invite Him to have His way. Reflect on difficult periods in your life. Ask God to show you how it has been used for good. Be sure to thank Him for his presence, provision, and purpose in it all.

·         Read some books on gratitude. Here are a few suggestions:

o   “Choosing Gratitude” by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

o   “Exceeding Gratitude for the Creator’s Plan” by James P. Gills

o   “Radical Gratitude – Discovering Joy through Everyday Thankfulness” by  Ellen Vaughn

All about Health/Nutrition:

What You Didn’t Know About Drinking Water

We all know that our beverage of choice really should be water. In fact, “water is the single most important nutrient for our bodies” (Don Colbert, “Eat This and Live”).

Beverage manufacturers have discovered all sorts of ways to market on our increased awareness concerning our need for water. Now we can get all sorts of flavor and vitamin enhanced waters – so we don’t have to be bored with the plain stuff. But here are some interesting facts about drinking water that you maybe didn’t know.

·         While you may be more enticed to actually drink water, the flavored and/or vitamin enhanced water is not necessarily a good choice. Many of these products add sucralose or other artificial sweeteners. Some argue these sweeteners can cause a host of health problems including cancer. It may not be worth the risk. For a healthy alternative, use plain water and choose a flavor made with stevia (http://www.stevia.com/)   instead.

·         Dehydration can play a role in joint pain, heartburn, depression and a whole host of other health problems.*

·         Do not drink too much water at mealtime, it actually weakens the digestive acids in your stomach – delaying digestion.*

·         How much water should you drink? Divide your weight (in pounds) in half. That is how many ounces of water your body needs each day!*

It is also encouraged that water be filtered for greater purity. Look for filtering processes that use an alkalizing process for the greatest quality. (*source: Don Colbert, “Eat This and Live”).

All About Finances:

What is Financial Health?

“Financial health” has become sort of a catch phrase in recent times. I suppose if we were to refer to someone as “financially healthy” it would imply a number of things. We would conclude they had enough income to meet (and probably exceed) their monthly expenses. They live within a budget. We would assume they were not overloaded with debt. We might even imagine this person has some savings to fall back on in the event of emergencies or upcoming retirement.

That sure sounds like the picture of “financial health” that I’ve been sold. But I wonder if God has a different view concerning financial health.

I believe His picture would include generosity; trust in God – not riches; obedience in tithing and giving; stewarding for the needs of the Kingdom over personal lusts of the flesh; and a willingness to surrender all possession to follow Him.

You see, it’s not that the world’s view of financial health is inherently evil. We can even find Biblical precedence for such a model. But just because we stand right with our money in the world’s eyes does not mean we stand right with our money in God’s eyes.

Either He is Lord of every dollar and every dime, or He is not – and He knows the truth of the matter. When we deal with our money in relationship to principles we can shut out God’s voice. We subsequently shut out His ability to bless our finances. Financial health begins and ends with inviting God to have His rightful place over our money.

All about Relationships:

Dying to Our Expectations

Okay, I have a confession to make. I needed to humble myself and apologize to our oldest daughter, Cassandra. What made this particularly difficult was the fact that I had been deeply hurt. I wanted to hold on to my “right” to be injured and that it made it extremely difficult to say, “I’m sorry”.

It started simple enough. I spontaneously decided to put together a family movie night, complete with the newest Chronicles of Narnia movie and ice cream. Now this is something we rarely ever do – but I knew that my kids would be excited and blessed! Naturally – this blessing would increase my value in their eyes as well, right?

However, what I did NOT know was earlier in the day, Cassee, who IS eighteen, made other plans to spend time with her friend’s family. When I sprung our surprise movie night on her, she was not impressed. In fact, she didn’t appear remotely interested. She casually informed me she had other plans and would not be home.

Now, in all honesty, I was crushed. I couldn’t believe it was more important to her to go out and get ice cream with her friend’s family then come home and be with us. Talk about being deflated! I mean, we hardly ever do this, and to feel so betrayed – ouch! I felt justly offended.

But in truth, Cassee’s decision to move forward with her original plan was not sinful nor was it done in a spirit of harm towards me. It was simply her choice, her preference, to keep her original commitment.

I chose to be hurt because I expected her to want what I wanted for the evening. I expected her to appreciate the blessing – not turn it down. I expected her to be excited, but she was relatively disinterested. And I have to admit, I was somewhat callous toward her as a result.

That’s when the Holy Spirit (coupled with some prodding by my husband) made me deal with the selfish condition of my heart. My expectation for the evening created a demanding heart. When these expectations were not met, I wanted Cassee to feel my pain. This is NOT walking in love. I had no right to demand Cassee meet my expectations – and I knew it.

But still I hurt. I wanted our family movie event to be as important to her as it was to me. It was hard to accept that it wasn’t as important to her and that is okay. I had to renew my commitment to walk in love toward Cassee, meaning I had to let go of the offense brought on by my own expectations. So I did the hard stuff, and confessed to Cassee that while I was hurt, I had no right to demand she satisfy my expectations. I asked her forgiveness, and of course, being the wonderful daughter that she is, she graciously gave it.

I am learning to be increasingly mindful of my motivations and expectations. When we look to others to fulfill our sense of worth, value, and meaning – God will allow us to be frustrated. These things can only be met in Him. By letting go of our expectations of others, we free ourselves from the pain of disappointment.

All about Discipleship:

Tap into the Life-Changing Power of Praise

How much time do you spend in praise and worship – you know, making a conscious effort to ascribe glory to the God we serve? Is it limited to Sunday morning worship service? For many believers, this is true. Maybe we stop and praise Him when He answers a big need.

Yet praising God should be a daily discipline in the life of a believer. He is attracted to us when we declare His greatness. In fact, Scripture tells us God inhabits the praises of His people. Do you want God on the scene in your daily life? Start declaring His praises!

You spend enormous amounts of time each day worrying about situations over which you have very little control. Focus your efforts on praising God, and watch Him move! Magnify the mountain mover – not the mountain.

Praising God brings His presence. His presence brings transformation – both in our own hearts and in our circumstances. Practice praising Him for who He is and what He has done for you. Make praise a daily priority in your life. Start your day with His praise on your lips, end your nights with His praise on your lips - He is worthy!

Feeding the Flesh

I was recently prompted to go on a three day fast. Most food and beverages were off limits.  Oh how I missed my coffeeJ. I believe the Lord prompted the fast because I had been encountering significant resistance while moving forward in the call of God. I saw this happening to others as well.

I spent time with the Lord, engaging in worship and prayer; Scripture study; quiet meditation, and such – but did not experience an encounter with Him to the degree I had hoped when I started the fast.

By the end of the third day, I found myself tempted to focus on what I was going to eat in the days ahead. All the food I was currently saying “no” to would soon be available for my choosing. It would no longer be a matter of denying myself; I would be free to have whatever I craved. That was my “aha” moment.

You see, it’s one thing to have a limit to your “fast”. You may get to choose how long you will go without, or even “what” you will go without. It’s something else altogether to accept that we are called to “deny ourselves daily”.

 So, what if the Lord does not want me to return to the same level “freedom” in my diet? What if He wants to tell me “no” when I want to reach for the glazed donut? Would I listen? Would I accept that He has the right to control what I eat, when I eat, and how much I eat?

I am beginning to realize just how much sway the appetite of the flesh still holds over me – just put chocolate in front of me and I crumbleJ. Okay, maybe not crumble, but it’s unlikely I will say “no”.

The appetites of the flesh don’t concern just food either. It can be any source of pleasure.  Take for instance the area of entertainment – are we willing to miss “Dancing with the Stars” because the Lord wants His Bride to spend time dancing with Him? Do we argue that at least we aren’t watching “morally degrading” programs? That may be true, but how much of it nourishes our Spirit?

The appetites of the flesh also manifest as greed or the constant striving to get more stuff, better stuff, the newest stuff.  I don’t particularly care to shop, but I still can find myself longing to decorate my home in some cute way or find some snazzy new outfit to wear. For some, NOT being able to fulfill those desires leaves feelings of frustration or emptiness. If the money is available to pursue such wants, do we stop and question whether that is truly how God would have us use that money? Or do we justify that we’ve earned it and continue to use the money as a tool to satisfy our flesh desires?

Our flesh appetite can even appear in relationships to others. When we look to control others to minimize our discomfort we are seeking to please the flesh. When we strive to get affirmation or attention from others in order to feel good about ourselves, we are longing to feed the flesh. When we demand our rights – we feed the flesh!

I am grateful that God is showing me that I still don’t deny myself to the degree of which He is worthy. I still need to enter into greater surrender and willingness to let him dictate ALL circumstances of my life.  This is not to be just some three day event, but rather a new way of life! Lord truly, your will be done.

March Newsletter (Soul Care Center)

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All About Relationships

Little Things Mean a Lot

When I was young there was a song by that very title. Little did I realize then how much truth is in those words. When it comes to expressing love to those we care about, little things really do mean a lot. Let’s look at how this works in our marriages. When my husband takes time to text me encouragement throughout the day, brings me a gift, or prepares my coffee pot for the day ahead, it tells me that he thinks about me – that I am important to him. Likewise, when I bring home tapioca pudding from the store, encourage him to take time out for himself, or leave a love note in his car, he is reminded that I am thinking of him and value our relationship. None of these expressions take a great deal of time, money or effort. However, they communicate love in a big way. It is so important that we invest in those things that truly matter most. Making it a priority to show your love – even in little ways – will have such a big impact on the condition of your relationships. Don’t limit this truth to just marriage either. For example, kids delight in cards sent through old-fashioned snail mail, a special treat given “just because”, or even extra cuddle time with mom or dad. Any creative way to show others you are thinking of them can make a world of difference in their day!
What will you do today to show others you really care?!



All About Health

Improve Your Health with Living Food

One of the simplest ways we can improve our health is to limit our intake of processed foods and replace them with live foods instead. Eating a diet rich in fruits, vegetables, nuts and whole grains can dramatically reduce the risk of disease while increasing your overall health. In our culture it is so easy to turn to the processed, nutritionally void convenient options presented in our stores. But making little changes can lead us, in time, to a lifestyle change that provides substantial health benefits. Instead of snacking on chips, cookies, and other “dead” foods, reach for a “living” alternative.

Here are some of our favorites:

For sweet snacks alternative try: bananas, apples, dates, raisins, pears, watermelon, strawberries, tangerines, grapes, almonds mixed with dried cranberries, or cantaloupe.

To satisfy your craving for salt try: cucumber, baked potatoes, celery, air popped popcorn, rye bread, sugar snap peas, pecans, sunflower seeds, or hard boiled eggs.

Making small changes throughout the day can lessen the cravings for sugar and processed foods – making it even easier to reach for the living food alternatives in the future.


All About Discipleship

So You Really Want Eternal Life?

Alright, I suppose that’s a ridiculous question. Of course we want to spend eternity in the presence of God. But what exactly is eternal life? Jesus tells us in John 17 verse 3 that eternal life is relationship with the Living God. The amplified Bible puts it this way:

“And this is eternal life: [it means] to know (to perceive, recognize, become acquainted with, and understand) You, the only true and real God, and [likewise] to know Him, Jesus [as the] Christ (the Anointed One, the Messiah), Whom You have sent.”

So to say we want eternal life means that we want to grow in our relationship with (not just knowledge of) God. This intimate relationship can begin because of the sacrifice Jesus offered on the cross. He made the way for us to enter God’s presence and have fellowship with Him.

However, how important is that relationship to us? For a sad number of “believers” – daily life shows little effort of pursuing honest, committed, intimate relationship with God. At best, our relationship with God is relegated to a few hours of devotion on Sunday morning coupled with sincere efforts not to commit “major” sins that might offend Him.

But that is not why Jesus came and died for us. He came so that we can have a deep relationship with our Creator. If that is not a sincere pursuit of our daily life NOW – how will we convince Him we desire that relationship once we die? Are we not in danger of hearing “depart from me, I never knew you”?

God wants a relationship with you NOW – not in some ethereal future. He paid a tremendous price to come and set you free – to release you into the fullness of life for which you were designed. You will never come to perceive, recognize, become acquainted with, or understand the One who loves you if you don’t make time with Him a priority.

So do you really want eternal life? How does it show in your daily living?


All About Finances

Generating Multiple Streams of Income

We don’t need to spend any time discussing the many difficulties people are facing as a result of rising prices and stagnating wages. Few of us are at a point where it is NOT a struggle to make ends meet. Unexpected expenses such as auto repairs, medical bills, school fees, and so on, are enough to take us over the “cliff” of financial difficulty.

Cutting corners and being frugal go only so far in today’s economy. So what is one to do?

Sometimes the solution is not just to minimize expenses – at times we must look for ways to create additional income. In today’s job market, adding a second (or maybe third) job isn’t necessarily the best alternative. Yet there are additional ways to generate income besides just earning a paycheck.

For example, have you ever considered becoming an “info”preneur? If you have a passion in a particular area – you can build a website that generates income by sharing your knowledge. Not a techie? That’s okay too because there are programs out there that can help you take your ideas and make them “live” on the web.

Site Build It is a user friendly web program that caters to beginners and experts alike. They are currently offering scholarships to qualified applicants that show sincere dedication to pursuing the passion of creating their own online business. Learn more at by visiting http://www.sitesell.org/.


All About Emotions

You Have Power over Your Feelings

We all have them; those events that happen that seem to create a mini-volcano in your soul. Arguments with a spouse, disobedient children, demanding bosses, financial frustration, inconsiderate colleagues, or unforeseen crises can grate on our sense of well-being.

However, we must be careful not to let our feelings rule over us. While we all fall short, we cannot excuse our reactions on our feelings.

How often we hear horror stories of abuse or harm done in a fit of rage. The perpetrator then wants to blame the victim for making him or her “feel” so angry that they lost control. This is a lie meant to excuse the perpetrator from taking responsibility for their actions.

While our own “fits of rage” may not be so dramatic, they still damage the souls of anyone in its path. Harsh words get spoken; hatred gets communicated in word or deed; relationships are damaged; blood pressure rises; and, so on.

There is only one person who has power over the way you feel and what you choose to do with those feelings. That person is YOU. If you do not like the “fruit” of your responses, maybe it is time to consider a new approach. Our life coaches can help you improve coping skills and develop greater emotional health! Call 330-704-5490 to learn more.

Its Time to Take Back What Was Stolen

Are you facing some giants as you move to inherit the promises of God in your life? Have you stepped out in faith to live out your purpose, only to be confronted with fear, discouragement, and challenges beyond your imagination?

Be of good courage – you are in great company. Just as the Israelites had to face the giants of the land – so we too, will face personal giants as we walk toward the promises God has purchased for us.

The Lord did not drive out the giants in the Promised Land all at once.  He purposely left them there as a tool to grow the Israelites and keep them dependent on Him. So, too, your giants are there to train you and keep you fully aware of your need for God.

So how then do we war against these giants in the land God has given us? We must absolutely walk in faith not fear. Ten of the twelve spies were convinced it was impossible for the Israelites to inherit what God promised. They swayed a whole nation to shrink back, leaving them to wander in the desert for forty years.

God’s people saw His hand perform miracle after miracle causing Pharaoh to release them from captivity in Egypt. He parted the Red Sea to have them cross on dry land, and then had the sea swallow up Pharaoh and his army. He fed them in the desert and caused water to gush forth from a rock. His very presence was known to them in a cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night.

How then could they so easily believe He would not give them the very land He promised? It’s quite simple actually. They believed THEY were responsible to dispossess the giants. By looking at only their ability, might and power – it truly was an impossible task.

And so it is for us! God gives us a vision. He leads us into the calling He has always destined for us.  We’ve seen His hand at work in our lives, bringing us from captivity into freedom. We’ve watched Him miraculously care for us in the dry places. We’ve known His very presence. But there are giants in the land before us.

And now we must choose - do we shrink back in fear and step forward in faith. If we focus on ourselves: our ability, our talent, our power, our wisdom, our strength, etc. we will succumb to fear -  for we are unable. If, however, we focus on God, victory is as close as our next step.

It is God’s good will to give us the Kingdom – He makes this clear in His word. But we must choose to possess the land. We must be willing to confront the giants, while we stand and see the deliverance of our God. We must choose faith – for even if the outcomes are different than we expect, God works all things to the good for those who love Him and are called according to His purposes.

It is time for the Body of Christ to align itself with the purposes of the one who called us. It is time to get over our fear of giants. It is time to stop relying on our own strength and understanding. It is time for radical, relentless obedience to our King. It is time to walk in the purposes and power of the God who called us for His glory.

Stand up and fight!

Three Keys to Overcoming Difficulty

^“We have troubles all around us, but we are not defeated. We do not know what to do, but we do not give up the

 hope of living. We are persecuted, but God does not leave us. We are hurt sometimes, but we are not

destroyed” (2 Cor. 4:8-9 NCV).

Walking with Christ does not mean we will walk a life free from pain and difficulty. In fact, we can be assured that like the apostle Paul, we will face trouble all around. The real challenge then, is to CHOOSE not give into defeat or despair in the midst of difficult circumstances. Victory is learning to walk with Jesus through hardship while maintaining proper perspective and choosing right response.

Here are three keys to help you walk through difficult times:

Praise God despite your circumstances:

 We see numerous examples in Scripture of the power of praising God in the most difficult of circumstances. God is always worthy of praise, regardless of the struggle you may be enduring. HE never changes and HE is with you in the midst of it all. Rather than focusing entirely on your pain and the difficulty you are facing, why not focus on the GREATNESS of your GOD! Rather than magnifying your mountain, magnify your God instead!

Cultivate a heart of thanksgiving:

Just as praise adjusts your focus, thanksgiving takes the eyes of your heart off negatives and places them on positives. Thanksgiving is the seed that prepares a harvest of joy. Joy is not dependent on circumstances. Keep in mind the joy of the Lord is your strength that brings you through hard times. Regularly cultivating a heart of gratitude will empower you with a healthy perspective during difficult times.

Serve others:

 It is tempting to become self-centered in the midst of hard times. We can allow worry to consume us. We can choose to spend our energy and time striving to control circumstances that we really have NO power to change.  It is during these times that we have the greatest opportunity to touch the Father’s heart by pursuing HIS Kingdom first despite our pain.

In essence, we must commit to laying down our life (our own interests) with intentions to bless others. I believe this truly moves the heart of our Father and brings healing and freedom to our own lives as a result.

Remember, difficult and painful times will come. You have the power to CHOOSE how you will respond to them. Will your response bring honor and glory to God?

An Army of Lovers

^{Psalm 18 (NCV)}

³⁴ He trains my hands for battle
       so my arms can bend a bronze bow.
 ³⁵ You protect me with your saving shield.
       You support me with your right hand.
       You have stooped to make me great.
 ³⁶ You give me a better way to live,
       so I live as you want me to.
 ³⁷ I chased my enemies and caught them.
       I did not quit until they were destroyed.
 ³⁸ I crushed them so they couldn't rise up again.
       They fell beneath my feet.
 ³⁹ You gave me strength in battle.

Psalm 18 has meant much to me over the past year. I knew that God was indeed training me for battle – but I honestly had no idea what that meant. Even now I would not claim complete understanding but I can look back and see how circumstances were used by God to put me through that training.

Two things have become increasingly clear.

First, the body of Christ is entering a season when we must do battle to advance the Kingdom of God. We can no longer take a passive posture waiting to be attacked by the enemy. Instead, it is time to assemble together and storm the gates of hell.

Second, we will storm the gates of hell only by allowing God to transform us into an army of lovers. The kingdom of hell shudders when the body of Christ walks in the power of pure, Christ-like love.

Read verse 36 again. Compare it with the very last verse in 1 Corinthians chapter 12 “And now I will show you the best way of all.” What follows is typically known as the “love chapter”. Paul tells us that even though we have all the gifts to build the body of Christ and advance the Kingdom of God, the best way to live is to love. Love never fails!!

God is calling His children to train for war by teaching them to love deeply!  This is not the conditional, convenience based, limited love we’ve come to know from the world. It is a fierce love that never waivers. It is a love that does not seek the giver’s interest, but seeks the KING’S interest by committing to love others as HE does.

Be assured no person can love like this in his or her own strength – it is not “of the flesh”.  This love can only be found at the cross. It is only when we lay down our lives that we can walk in the resurrection power to love beyond our limitations – to love as our Lord loves!

We cannot love as Christ calls us to love without travelling the Way of the cross.

We cannot advance the Kingdom of God without loving as HE does

Kingdom advancement will only happen to the extent that we are willing to endure the brutal and absolute surrender found at the cross.